Episode 11: The Great MTRCB Raid / Ang Epiko nina Mike Punzalan at Asa Shigure

A six-man party is formed to infiltrate the MTRCB's office. The required party members: Matthew Luke, Hyacinth, Yumi, Sachiko. For the sake of completion, the party is composed of Matthew Luke, Hyacinth, Yumi, Sachiko, Korina, and Erich.

Meanwhile, before the raid on the office, the two perpetrators of the "Hello, Henry?" scandal, Felipe Gozon and Emily Abrera (they're also the ones who manipulate Laguardia behind the scenes), expect the expected.

Gozon: Sila na naman? Hindi sila tumitigil sa mga pananabotahe sa mga plano natin!
Abrera: Ngayon, masisilat na sila. Dahil ang mga guwardiya sa building na ito ay pawang mga malalakas na halimaw. Sila'y mamamatay sa sindak tulad ng mga biktima ni Sadako.
Gozon: Teka muna! Di mo ba alam na yung babaeng may berdeng buhok ay mula sa isa sa mga anime na ipinagbawal natin?
Abrera: Aah, si Asa Shigure, mula sa "SHUFFLE!", ha?
Gozon: Dahil sumapi na siya sa mga pesteng iyon, bigyan natin siya ng isang espesyal na regalo kung sakaling makatuntong siya rito.
Abrera: Ano?
Gozon: I-summon natin ang kanyang matinding kaaway, ang babaeng psychotic na ang paboritong sandata ay isang cutter... si Kaede Fuyou!
Abrera: Magaling, magaling!

And so, the two summon Kaede using some devilish chant. After a few minutes, Kaede shows up in front of them.

Kaede: Anong maipaglilingkod sa inyo?
Gozon: Miss Kaede, kung meron kang makitang babae na may berdeng buhok at nagngangalang Asa Shigure, supilin siya agad! Pati na rin ang ibang taong magtatangkang pasukin ang gusaling ito!
Kaede: Heh heh heh. Masusunod... Panginoong Gozon at Panginoong Abrera.

Kaede's eyes now show the signs of psychosis.

Meanwhile, back at Hyacinth's house, Asa suddenly recovers.

Asa: *Huff... huff...* Bakit bigla akong nagising?
Female voice: Asa... Asa...
Asa: Ha? Kaede?
Kaede's voice: Nagbabalik ako... upang ligpitin kita...
Asa: Anong?
Kaede's voice: Hinding-hindi ko makakalimutan ang ginawa mong pang-aagaw mo kay Rin mula sa akin.
Asa: Akala ko ba, tapos na ang lahat?
Kaede's voice: Hindi pa tapos. Kaya halika na, doon sa opisina ng Movie and Television Review Classification Board. Magtutuos tayo roon. Heh heh heh... (fades)
Asa: Kaede, talagang ililigtas kita mula sa psychosis mo.

And thus she sneaks out of the house without Hattori and the others knowing it. Some minutes later, Hattori and Lito come to the room where Asa was resting.

Hattori: Asa? Bakit siya nawawala?
Lito: Di pa siya nakapagpahinga nang sapat... ano na ang ginagawa niya?

The raid now starts.

(Dungeon portion: Tear your way through monsters just like before. Recommended dungeon BGM: "Introduction to the Darkness" from Romancing SaGa.)

Halfway through the path to the MTRCB, the party faces the girl with the cutter.

Kaede: Heh heh heh. Dumating kayo sa wakas. Alam ninyo, medyo bored na ako. Kaya... okey lang ba na bigyan ko kayo ng panandaliang aliw?
Matthew Luke: Ikaw si Kaede Fuyou, no? Yung... kakilala ni Asa?
Kaede: Tumpak. At alam ko at alam din ninyong lahat na ako ay inutos nina Panginoong Gozon at Panginoong Abrera para pigilan ko kayo na makalapit sa kanila.
Hyacinth: Obvious ba, Binibining Cutter?
Yumi: Tama na ang dada.
Sachiko: Kailangan nating makarating sa opisina ng MTRCB!

Suddenly, Asa pops up in front of Kaede.

Kaede: Heh heh. Sa wakas, dumating na ang mag-aagaw na pokpok.
Asa: Huwag na huwag mo akong tatawaging pokpok!
Matthew Luke, Hyacinth, Yumi, Sachiko: A... Asa?! Paanong...?
Asa: (faces the party with a smile) Mga kasama, huwag kayong mag-aalala. Ako na ang sasalba sa problemang ito. (faces Kaede) Sige na, Kaede. Kumawala ka mula sa pesteng psychosis na iyan!
Kaede: Mas mabuti pa kung kumawala ka sa mundong ito... (brandishes cutter) Asa!

THE TIME OF RETRIBUTION -- DECIDE THE DESTINY!

[Duel: Asa Shigure versus Kaede Fuyou]

Attack:
Tikman mo ang talim ng cutter ko!
Hindi lang ito isang ordinaryong cutter!
Huwag kang kukurap!
Okey lang ito; para itong kagat ng langgam.
Sa akin lang si Rin! Wala nang iba!

Defend:
Heh heh heh...
Heh...
Tutunganga ka lang ba?
Kakaba ka ba?
Nanginginig ka ba?

Deathblow:
Ang isang katulad mo... ay dapat mamatay!
Inagaw mo sa akin si Rin, kaya dapat kang mamatay!
Asa... asa ka!
Rin, ililigtas kita mula sa pokpok na nasa harapan ko!
Espiritu ng cutter, bigyan mo ako ng kapangyarihan!

[End of duel]

Kaede: Natalo mo ako, Asa... pero nagsisimula pa lang ang laban!

Afterwards, Kaede transforms into a monster due to malice-induced psychosis. She now takes the form of a six-armed lamia, with each arm wielding a sword that exactly looks like a cutter.

Kaede: Asa... asa ka pa! Heh heh heh! At para sa inyong mga matitigas ang ulo, sabay-sabay kayong mamamatay kasa ang pokpok na ito!
Asa: Baka hindi ko siya kaya nang mag-isa... Matt, Hyacinth, Yumi, Sachiko, mga kasama, sama-sama tayong lumaban.

With that premise, Asa joins the party. Because the max party size is exceeded, Erich decides to take the sidelines.



A BOSS BATTLE COMMENCES!

Allies: The ones who you brought at the beginning of the raid
Enemy: Malice Kaede Fuyou (HP: 2,506)

Required party members: Matthew Luke, Hyacinth, Yumi, Sachiko, Asa

Starting line-up: Matthew Luke, Hyacinth, Yumi, Sachiko, Asa, Korina

Matthew Luke chooses to attack Malice Kaede Fuyou. He deals 167 damage to Malice Kaede Fuyou.
Hyacinth chooses to attack Malice Kaede Fuyou. She deals 130 damage to Malice Kaede Fuyou.
Malice Kaede Fuyou chooses to attack Asa. She deals 56 damage to Asa.
Yumi chooses to cast Aimed Shot on Malice Kaede Fuyou. She deals 306 damage to Malice Kaede Fuyou.
Sachiko chooses to cast Aimed Shot on Malice Kaede Fuyou. She deals 214 damage to Malice Kaede Fuyou.
Malice Kaede Fuyou chooses to cast Rain of Cutters on all allies. She deals 95 damage to each ally.
Korina chooses to attack Malice Kaede Fuyou. She deals 153 damage to her.
Asa chooses to cast Cheerful Pierce on Malice Kaede Fuyou. She deals 191 damage to Malice Kaede Fuyou.
Malice Kaede Fuyou chooses to cast Psychosis Dirge on Asa. She deals 106 damage to Asa. Asa is now in critical condition.
Matthew Luke chooses to use Gatorade on Asa. Asa recovers 150 HP. Critical condition removed.
Hyacinth chooses to defend.
Malice Kaede Fuyou chooses to cast Cutter Dart on Asa. She deals 66 damage to Asa.
Yumi chooses to attack Malice Kaede Fuyou. She deals 130 damage to Malice Kaede Fuyou.
Sachiko chooses to attack Malice Kaede Fuyou. She deals 381 damage to Malice Kaede Fuyou. A critical hit!
Malice Kaede Fuyou chooses to attack Asa. She deals 65 damage to Asa. Asa is now in critical condition.
Korina chooses to attack Malice Kaede Fuyou. She deals 400 damage to Malice Kaede Fuyou. A critical hit!
Asa chooses to cast Cheerful Pierce on Malice Kaede Fuyou. She deals 443 damage to Malice Kaede Fuyou.

Malice Kaede Fuyou: GGGGGWWWWAAAAAHHHHH!!! Pagbabayaran mo ito ng kamatayan mo, Asa!

(explodes)

BATTLE WON!

On the spot where the monster exploded, a girl lies unconscious. But then, she wakes up.

Asa: K-Kaede? OK ka na ba?
Kaede: Ahh... ughh... nasaan ba ako...? (gasps) Ha? Asa?
Asa: Kaede! Mabuti't naaala mo pa ako. Nandito na tayo sa Pilipinas.
Kaede: At saka... sino ba... ang mga kasama mo?
Asa: Heto, ipapakilala ko sila sa iyo.

Asa introduces the rest of the party to Kaede.

Matthew Luke: Kaede, meron pa kaming misyon na kailangang tapusin.
Sachiko: Tumuloy ka muna sa headquarters namin. Magpahinga ka kung gusto mo.

With those instructions, Kaede prepares to leave the building.

Asa: Kaede...
Kaede: Ano iyon, Asa?
Asa: Sorry doon sa isyung may kinalaman kay Rin.
Kaede: (smiles) OK lang iyon. Mula noong nalaman ko na nagka-psychosis ako, tinigilan ko na ang pagiging selosa. Gets mo, Asa?
Asa: Teehee! Oo! Sige, paalam!
Kaede: Goodbye, Asa! Goodbye, mga bago kong kaibigan! Kita-kits mamaya!

And with that, Kaede finally leaves.

Asa: Ngayon, mga kasama, kailangan nating ayusin ang gusot sa MTRCB na yan!
Hyacinth & Yumi: A.k.a. The MTRCB Shuffle!
Matthew Luke: Haha. Talaga kayo o...

(Dungeon portion, again: Course your way to the second half of the path to the MTRCB's office. The dungeon BGM is the same as before.)

And after a long, grueling trudge, the team finally finds Gozon and Abrera, with Laguardia still being manipulated by them.

Matthew Luke & Hyacinth: Hello, Gozon.
Yumi & Sachiko: Hello, Abrera.
Gozon: Ang ganyang pagbati... ay hindi akmang-akma.
Abrera: Siguro'y alam ninyong lahat ang mga dati naming plano na binisto ng mga kaalyado ninyo.
Matthew Luke: Siyempre. Ang pagtanggal sa ilang mga sensitibo kuno na mga anime.
Hyacinth: Ang pamimilit kay Hero Angeles na lumipat sa GMA.
Yumi & Sachiko: Tinanggal ninyo ang anime na pinagmulan namin, ang MariMite!
Asa: Pati na rin ang anime na punagmulan ko, ang SHUFFLE!
Matthew Luke: Pati si Laguardia, nadamay! Kailangan talagang tapusin kayong dalawa dahil hindi mapapatawad ng mga nanonood ng TV at pelikula ang mga kalapastangan ninyo!
Laguardia: (from a corner of the office) The edict is still enforced. All violators must be put to death.
Gozon: Ayan! Sabi iyan ni Laguardia, ha? Hinding-hindi mababali ang mga kautusan niya!

Out of nowhere...

Mysterious man: Hold it!
Abrera: Sino na naman itong sawsawero?
Mysterious man: Ako si Sir Mike Punzalan, dubber extraordinaire! Tinututol ko at ng ibang mga televiewers ang mga walang-habas na pagba-ban sa mga shows ng mga makikitid ang utak na tulad ninyo! Therefore, I demand an overhaul of MTRCB, where no censorships nor bans will be enforced due to narrow-minded morality!
Hyacinth: Sir Mike...
Sir Mike: Kung sang-ayon kayo sa ipinaglalaban ko, I won't stop you.
Gozon: Magsasanib-pwersa pala kayo, ha?
Abrera: You will all die!

The two prepare for a transformation.

Gozon & Abrera: Kapangyarihan nina Orochimaru at Karuma, ibigay sa amin!
Gozon: Orochi Felipe Gozon, engage!
Abrera: Orochi Emily Abrera, engage!

Gozon turns into a green humanoid who looks like Akuma, while Abrera turns into a half-human, half-plant creature who hangs from the ceiling of the office.

Gozon & Abrera: Tikman ang kapangyarihan namin, mga hampas-lupa!

They both let out a sonic slash that knocks Sir Mike out.

Yumi & Sachiko: Sir Mike!
Asa: Namimihasa talaga kayong dalawa!
Gozon & Abrera: Simula ngayon, ang MTRCB ang magiging unang sandalan ng moralidad!
Hyacinth & Asa: Baluktot na moralidad kuno!
Gozon & Abrera: Tumahimik kayo! Idaan na lang natin sa laban!



A BOSS BATTLE COMMENCES!

Allies: The ones who you brought at the beginning of the raid
Enemy: Orochi Felipe Gozon (HP: 4,340), Orochi Emily Abrera (HP: 2,460)

Required party members: Matthew Luke, Hyacinth, Yumi, Sachiko, Asa

Starting line-up: Matthew Luke, Hyacinth, Yumi, Sachiko, Asa, Korina

Matthew Luke chooses to do a cooperative attack with Hyacinth named "Osananajimi". That attack deals 10 hits and 446 damage to Orochi Felipe Gozon.
Orochi Felipe Gozon chooses to attack Asa. He deals 66 damage to Asa.
Yumi chooses to cast Aimed Shot on Orochi Felipe Gozon. She deals 307 damage to Orochi Felipe Gozon.
Sachiko chooses to cast Aimed Shot on Orochi Felipe Gozon. She deals 215 damage to Orochi Felipe Gozon.
Orochi Emily Abrera chooses to cast Riot of the Blood on all allies. She deals 105 damage to each ally.
Korina chooses to attack Orochi Emily Abrera. She deals 154 damage to her.
Asa chooses to cast Cheerful Pierce on Orochi Felipe Gozon. She deals 201 damage to Orochi Felipe Gozon.
Orochi Felipe Gozon chooses to cast Raging Demon -Shun Goku Satsu- on Hyacinth. Hyacinth is instantly KO'd.
Matthew Luke chooses to use 1-Use Defribulator on Hyacinth. Hyacinth is revived with 61 HP left.
Hyacinth chooses to use Gatorade on herself. Hyacinth recovers 150 HP. Critical condition removed.
Orochi Emily Abrera chooses to cast Ya Otome on Yumi. She deals 8 hits and 86 damage to Yumi.
Yumi chooses to do a cooperative attack with Sachiko named "Yuri-Filled Arrows". That attack deals 15 hits and 511 damage to each enemy.
Orochi Felipe Gozon chooses to attack Matthew Luke. He deals 75 damage to Matthew Luke.
Korina chooses to attack Orochi Felipe Gozon. She deals 401 damage to Orochi Felipe Gozon. A critical hit!
Asa chooses to cast Cheerful Pierce on Orochi Felipe Gozon. She deals 444 damage to Orochi Felipe Gozon.
Orochi Emily Abrera chooses to attack Korina. She deals 82 damage to Korina.
Matthew Luke chooses to do a cooperative attack with Hyacinth named "Osananajimi". That attack deals 10 hits and 815 damage to Orochi Felipe Gozon.

When the HP of either Gozon or Abrera is below 25% (in this case, it's Gozon's HP that's now below 25%), the two enemies unleash a powerful attack called "Verdant Censorship", causing the party's HP's to be down to 1.

BATTLE ENDED -- OR MAYBE NOT?

Gozon and Abrera: BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!! Kami ngayon ang mga hari ng MTRCB! Kami na ang mga guwardiya ng moralidad!
Matthew Luke: Arrgh... mga... hinayupak... kayo...
Asa: Pagbabayaran... n'yo... ito...

The two are ready to obliterate Matt & co. once and for all when...

Sir Mike: Freedom... Aegis... I summon you...

Sir Mike presses a button that ACTUALLY summons the Freedom and Aegis Gundams. That button, by the way, is the fabled "Wish Button" Lost Technology that he got from an auction.

And in a split second, the two Gundams appear right in front of the MTRCB office.

Kira: Party time! Buti na lang at kinumpuni ang mga Gundam natin!
Athrun: Teka muna, Kira...
Kira: Ano?
Athrun: Ang mga nakahiga... sina Matt iyon!
Kira: Oo nga no? At yung mga dalawang berdeng halimaw... sina Gozon at Abrera ang mga iyon!
Athrun: Aahh... yung mga sangkot sa "Hello, Henry?" scandal.
Kira: At yung isang taong kasama nina Matt... di ba, si Sir Mike Punzalan iyon? Yung naghawak sa ating show?
Athrun: Buti't naalala pa natin siya. Pinasalamat natin siya dati dahil maganda ang kontribusyon niya sa show natin.
Kira: Sige, dahil ngayong nasa kagipitan siya, natural na ang tumulong sa kanya.
Athrun: Sinabi mo pa, eh!

The two Gundam pilots then send a message to the still-weakened Matt & co., as well as Sir Mike.

Kira: Matt! Sir Mike!
Matthew Luke: Athrun?
Sir Mike: Kira?
Asa: Mga... kasama n'yo rin ba ang mga robot na iyon?
Hyacinth: Oo.
Athrun: Makinig kayong mabuti! Pasasabugin namin ang mga dalawang kalaban, kaya lumayo muna kayo mula sa expected radius of the explosion!
Gozon & Abrera: Mga sawsawero na naman? Kahit na robot pa kayo, hindi kayo makakaligtas sa amin!
Kira: Itong bagay sa inyo! (fires a long-lasting stun gun on the two enemies)
Gozon & Abrera: AAAAAAHHHHH!!!
Asa: Kira! Athrun! Meron akong naisip!
Athrun: Ano iyon, Asa?
Asa: Pagsasamahin namin ni Sir Mike ang mga kapangyarihan namin para lumikha ng isang barrier na poprotekta sa amin, pati na si Laguardia, mula sa explosion na gagawin ninyo!
Sir Mike: Sige, gagawin ko na ito.
Asa: Ngayon na! (poses) Ren'ai Ranger, power up! Ha!

Asa transforms into the Shuffle Ranger.

Asa and Sir Mike: (while holding and raising their hands) Barrier of Great Sheltering, materialize!

A barrier forms and protects practically everyone in the office, including Laguardia and excluding Gozon and Abrera.

Gozon & Abrera: GGGRRRR!!! Mga imoral na hangal!

Asa and Sir Mike: Sige! Tapos na ang barrier! Kira, Athrun, prepare to fire!
Kira & Athrun: Affirmative! All weapons ready! Targets confirmed! Ready... aim... FIRE!

With the combined power of their guns, the Gundams pulverize Gozon & Abrera, bringing the team to victory.

BATTLE WON!

After the climatic battle, the office of the MTRCB is almost a smoldering ruin, but the people who have been protected by the barrier made it without a single scratch.

Laguardia: Ugghh... ano ba ang ginagawa... ko...?
Yumi: Ha? Laguardia?

Matt & co., as well as Sir Mike, nurse Laguardia back to health while Kira and Athrun are looking on from outside the office, still in their respective Gundams.

Laguardia: Kayong mga taong hindi ko pa kilala... maraming salamat.
Sachiko: Don't mention it.
Laguardia: Alam ninyo, we at MTRCB got way too far in doing what the law told us. We were created only to review and classify shows and movies, not to censor or ban them altogether. But because narrow-minded morality got in the way, we violated the law, so to speak. Pinalala pa ito dahil sa pakikilalam nina Felipe Gozon at Emily Abrera.
Matthew Luke: Alam naming lahat ang situwasyon mo.
Laguardia: So therefore, for the remainder of my tenure of chairpersonship, I will vow never to ban nor censor any show becuase of narrow-minded morality. We will just set strict guidelines on the airing times of certain types of shows, especially anime.
Hyacinth: At paano naman yung edict na pinalabas ninyo kamakailan lang?
Laguardia: Of course, wala na iyon. The TV networks can have their right to air the shows that I unwillfully banned.
Asa: Salamat, Chairman Laguardia.

From the outside of the office...

Kira: All's well that ends well, right?
Athrun: Teka muna. Sino ang magbabayad sa repairs ng MTRCB?
Kira: Uhh...

Some hours later, back at Hyacinth's house...

Sir Mike: Matt, Asa, Kira, Athrun, mga bago kong kaibigan, maraming salamat sa pagtulong ninyo sa aking ipinaglaban.
Asa: Siyempre naman. Te-hee!
Sachiko: Hindi naman kami umaasa ng kabayaran.
Sir Mike: Hindi naman ito talaga kabayaran, pero... pwede ba akong sumali sa grupo ninyo?
Hyacinth: Sure na sure!
Kira: Ang isang kaibigan ng mga Gundam pilots na tulad namin ay siya ring kaibigan nating lahat.
Matthew Luke: It's final. Sir Mike Punzalan, you are therefore a part of our group from now on. Congratulations.

And rounds of applause from the (still incomplete) Stars of Destiny rock the house in acceptance of Sir Mike's assimilation.

Meanwhile, back at the GMA HQ...

Because Gozon is gone, GMA declares an all-out war against ABS-CBN. What's the war plan, you say?

Wilma Galvante: Dahil wala na si Komrad Gozon, tayong lahat ng mga Kapuso ay magdedeklara ng all-out war laban sa pesteng ABS-CBN! Maglalagay tayo ng mga nuclear missiles na pupunta sa direksiyon ng mga Lopez! Isang pindot lang ng butong ito, magugunaw na ang kabila! Magtatagumpay tayong mga Kapuso! Magiging No. 1 tayo forever and ever!
Rest of GMA's top brass: Viva Kapuso! No. 1 pa rin tayo!

The network war heats up more than you expect.

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Stars Introduced So Far

None